Before I share self-protection strategies against harmful and violent relationships, I will give information about how prevalent human rights violations are worldwide. Beginning with Afghanistan, there is a big human rights deterioration since 2023, especially against women and girls. According to Human Rights Watch it has been concluded that the consisted pattern of abuses against women and girls in Afghanistan has amounted to the crime against humanity of gender persecution. The injustices against women in Afghanistan are of astronomical and heathenistic proportions.
The issues of abuse and human rights issues are too massive to divulge in this article. However, I will encourage you to read more on these websites given in this write up. It is noted that most widespread human rights violation is violence against women and girls. A few countries like North Korea, Iran, and South Sudan are some of the countries that have refused to sign the universal Declaration on Human Rights. Therefore women and girls in these countries, technically speaking, have no shield of protection against gender abuse in their countries.
Let’s take a look at some statistics on a few countries on domestic abuse:
- 1 out of 4 Chinese women had experienced physical violence in the past year. In 2022, reported files from the National Bureau of statistics indicate that domestic violence rose from 94,571 to over 100,000 families that have experienced domestic violence.
- According to the 2019 Nigerian National Bureau of Statistics 30% of Nigerian women aged 15-49 have experienced physical violence and 68% have gone through emotional, economic and sexual abuse. In July 2023, 36% of spousal violence is prevalent in Nigeria.
- In Asia and the Pacific, it is averaged that 75% of women have experienced sexual harassment. The unfortunate reality is that women that are abused are less likely to report sexual abuse because they fear, retaliation, rejection, victim blaming, and stigmatization.
From all the scary figures that are represented, it’s extremely important for all girls and women to be informed about ways to protect themselves from harmful and violent relationship. Bear in mind that I am very aware of the countless and unlimited manifestations of male dominance over millions of helpless and victimized girls and women in most cultures around the world. From early child marriages to sex-exploitation of females, unfortunately many will never be able to protect themselves from various forms of abuse and victimization.
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There are 10 recognized risk factors that increases the likelihood of a negative harmful and violent outcome. Some factors are as a result of a person’s behavior, while others are a result of the environment where a person lives. Lacking self-respect is at the top of the list. In addition, lacking social skills, alcohol and drug abuse among others.
Steps To take if you are in a harmful or violent relationship.
- Monitor and evaluate your present relationship. Does the behavior of the other person causes you to be uncomfortable or alarmed.
- Be mindful that you cannot change the other person’s harmful behaviors. When their behavior become life threatening, it’s time to leave the relationship.
- Explain the changes that you expect from the person and yourself.
- Talk with an experienced adult rather you should stay or leave the relationship.
- The expectations in the relationships should have top priority. Develop strategies for maintaining the relationship if both of you agree.
- Set a plan for you and your partner to make a realistic reevaluation of your relationship. This will include a time frame for the expected behavior changes.
If you are in a violent or harmful relationship or someone you know is suffering from abuse, please call the Gender- Based Violence number (1195).
The writer is a professional counseling psychologist, certified health educator. She holds talks in schools and churches.
By Doris Foxworth Odito
She can be reached at
0722-617404.
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